Still trying to strike a balance. Its more difficult than I thought it would be.

NPCC stuff, RE, Exercise, Bboying, Writing, Mugging, Sleep.

I'm pretty damned worried about the History Test tomorrow and even more worried about the Physics one on friday.

Now, a problem is that this year, Head NCOs have to do ADMIN. Instead of Head of Admin. Which is really weird, leaving Head NCOs unhappy with more work and Head of Admin unhappy because he doesn't really know what he has to do now.

Uniform has to be worn every week now. Check it to my list of troubles.

First history test of this year tomorrow. I'm gonna power through it, like how the Third Estates wtfpwned the pants off King Louis. Urrgh, King Louis.

I will.

Burn my Dread.

I am determined to rest fully tomorrow. No pushups, no running, no breaking. Alrite, maybe a couple of shuffles and indian steps, but thats all.

My abs complain. My calves complain. I don't complain ahahahah Oh god, im so dumb.

Sec 2s had full attendance today, excluding Brendan who still has medical problems. Hope it doesnt turn out to be worst case scenario.

*Excuses myself*

YEAH SEC 2S GOT FULL ATTENDANCE! YEAAAAAAH.

*Back*

Hoho, im just really happy that I've gotten their attendance back to the daniel-ish era attendance.

And now, homework AND Electropop!

Hey girl what's your name
L-u-v i see your game
It's okay i do it too
Make me want to play a fool

Here boy sign the line
Fools like you don't waste my time
I ain't game to play with you
Are you gonna follow through

Step inside we'll take a ride
Bonnie Clyde you and I
We can do this do or die
Why dont we just take a drive

Sounds gangster I'm gangster
We'll play the town prankster
Using up this bar we play
Then we make our getaway

Electropop hot
Funk addiction when I cant stop

I may be your sweet spot
Take me to your candy shop

Electropop hot
Funk friction when its getting hot

I'm feeling like its getting hot
Come on baby what you got

Electropop hot
Funk addiction when I cant stop

I may be your sweet spot
Take me to your candy shop

Electropop hot
Funk friction when its getting hot

I'm feeling like its getting hot
Come on baby what you got

Damn girl we're moving fast
Its a movie who's the cast
I can be your leading role
Wont you let me take control

Like Juliet I'm femme fatal
Take your pick I'll play them all
Each one to satisfy depending on the type of guy

I'm just a nervous type
Put me in your spotlight
I can talk this all night long
Only if we take it home

Ohhh that is not what I'm about
Men without backing out
That is how I strategize
So hold your breath for the surprise

Electropop hot
Funk addiction when I can't stop

I may be your sweet spot
Take me to your candy shop

Electropop hott
Funk friction when it's getting hot

I'm feeling like its getting hot
Come on baby what you got

Electropop hot
Funk Addiction when I can't stop

I may be your sweet spot
Take me to your candy shop

Electropop
Funk Friction when it's getting hot

Im feeling like its getting hot
Come on baby what you got

Don't want to spend this night alone
Cause your just what I need
I'll lock your digits on my phone
For as much as I tease
I know this affection may be temporary but
Nightlike behavior it is necesary
But for tonight yes we're doing it right
But you got my number if you like what you like

Electropop hot
Funk addiction when I cant stop

I may be your sweet spot
Take me to your candy shop

Electropop hot
Funk friction when its getting hot

Im feeling like its getting hot
Come on baby what you got

Electropop hot
Funk Addiction when its getting hot

I may be your sweet spot
Take me to your candy shop

Electropop
Friction its hot

I'm feeling like its getting hot
Come on baby what you got

P.s. I SO got owned by the stupid H section of the rock wall. Only reached 5th panel.. Trying it or section A on wednesday! Must at least reach 6th!

Alright.

Tues/ Fri/ Sun or Thurs/ Fri/ Sun.

I shall HARDCORE these days every week! Unless i have a damned good reason.

Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.Train.

Now have to balance bboying too with physical training.

Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.Bboying.

Haha see what i did there...i...balanced them....literally.

Argh. Whats wrong with me.

Alright, with this new training regiment and NPCC duties, and schoolwork, and soon to be coming Buckley stuff to do, i have effectively shut off thoughts of chance meetings with cute girls! Yeah!

But err, that doesn't rule out watching tv shows with cute Taiwanese co-hosts, so yes, I'm sticking to that every Saturday if i can, HOHOHO.

Hoho...

Okay, stop feeling sorry for yourself and focus! I'm supposed to have the mindset of a manly Tracker who drinks soya bean milk and eats lo mai kai! GRAAAAH!

Manly Tracker is off to rest and train tomorrow. WAAAAARGH.

Ps, i havent mugged for tests yet, oh no.

At least today marked the start of my exercising. Hope it doesnt end in like a week.

Lunar New Year CIP.

Kip it up. Better, faster.

And I collapse, letting the rain drench my soul.

The good today: I scaled the red level rock wall to the top, touching the top of the rock wall. As such, I finished green, red and I'm going to try the overhead yellow next P.E. Its pretty fun.

The bad: Not getting my SGT rank, having my NPCC CIP screwed, having to confront a possibly really pissed St Theresa's Home, not understanding lessons, realising just how shitty my breaking became after 1 week of no practice.

On the flipside, Ninja Warrior is really pretty awesome. Jap people ftw.

SSGT PT component tomorrow. I'm so damned tired. Lunar New Year CIP on Fri Night.

I still cling on to the tiny hope that I will pass SSGT.

Wargh Chen Wei.

Don't daydream about bboying sets.

Don't daydream about chance meetings with girls.

Don't daydream about having more chances to sleep.

Focus on what you need to do!

To desire:

I'm sorry i held you back. Many a time had I caused you to forgo opportunities, left you in the lurch, betrayed your trust. I ran away, the raw fear pulsating within my veins, the terror that is characteristic of me. Predictable.

Dreaming big is no problem, but taking the actions to achieve them is. So many goals left untouched, some have never seen the light of day, others shelved and forgotten, until a thick layer of dust settles on them; thus removing them. Sometimes permanently.

I am afraid. Afraid of rejection, afraid of loss.

But i'm learning. As the days go by, my mask cracks slowly, revealing that pale blueish that you have come to associate as my hide. I know its a little too late. But I'm getting there, slowly but surely.

I don't know if you can forgive me. You may very well promise me, but behind my back, cynically question me. You're not to blame. I am.

Forgive me.

Sincerely,
Inhibition.

..........................................................................

I need to make more sacrifices. I wanted to participate more in extra curricular activities, but I'm still in the process of ponying up the price.

Thank god they didn't have the SSGT retest today. With me being so damned tired from yesterday's running and sleeping late, I certainly wouldn't make the 11 minute mark.

Hell, I don't think I can make under 11.00 for the full 5 marks of that segment. 5 Pullups for 5 points should be okay though.

The closest I've ever gotten was 11.30. There's always a first i guess.

Its a very real reality that i may fail the SSGT test. I was at one of my worst forms during the test, especially during the Drill segment, where i lagged and did many commands wrongly. Oh well.

Another thing hanging around at the back of my mind is the Writer's Program. No idea whether I should join or not. Its not THAT intensive i think, but nevertheless, its still another commitment.

No mood for jokes today.