The New Old

A didactic post.

Making an effort to blog in the afternoon, cuz if i blog at night, I'll go mad about SNSD again (there's a perf today haha).

Currently, RI is dissolving all extra curriculum stuff, no dramafest, CCA, staying back in school after official lessons have ended, and possibly no DMP.

This kinda takes me back to when we just joined RI in Sec 1. No commitments.

I don't know if I'm glad about this. On one hand, I have more time to study and do whatever the heck I want to do, on the other, school life has been feeling kind of empty.

God, no DMP is gonna suck, i really need the time to slack off and mug haha.

I think this is the first blogpost in a long time that I've actually been able to organise my thoughts. Previously, I've just been throwing out random statements about stuff, so much so that it's become more of scribbling sentences on a wall than any actual coherent paragraphs.

I don't know why, but more and more memories of my past experiences has been flooding me over the last few days. Good ones, bad ones, unsmooth ones (its a bitter sweet thing) ranging from npcc trainings to getting ******** for being such a dumbass.

The point is, that all this stuff has helped me realise how far I've come from the kid who shivered in nervousness when he entered RI for the first time.

I didn't expect a lot of things to turn out the way they have. I really lucked out in certain aspects and in others, failed so miserably that I had to spend months of self-doubt and questioning, together with my totally shattered self-confidence.

What a rollercoaster.

It isn't going to stop when we enter RJ, and i predict even more turbulent events and friendships being strained. Forgive me if i sound too pessimistic or detached, but I'm ready to let some friendships go the moment we enter RJC. I say that in the sense that I'm going to grow distant from a number of friends, who will (pardon me for putting this so colloquially), go girl-crazy.

It isn't that difficult to predict, especially when someone puts talking to girls on a higher priority than talking to his guy friends. I'm really quite tired of trying to keep these strands of friendship hanging, and to be honest, I don't really care anymore. Go ahead, I won't blame you guys. Whether its ingrained in your personality or for whatever external factors, just go ahead.

I hope I didn't offend anyone here, just sharing my thoughts.

P.s. I'm staying off msn, at least for social talk for awhile. The moment more than 3 convos occur, I completely lose track of my work. Yup, multi-tasking fail.