"I toy with Temptation".

The words of the advertisement for Magnum ice-cream taunted me even in my dreams. In them, Eva kept repeating her lines over and over again. She mocked me for not being man enough to challenge temptation, to conquer it. As such, I took a stand.

I decided that tonight was the night. It was the night that i would become a real man. I would too toy with Temptation. Dinner was merely the ritual to open up the portal to manhood. I soon ransacked my fridge, looking for Temptation incarnate, the Magnum Ice-Cream. My family shouted that i was messing up the house. I didn't care. I was going to toy with temptation tonight. They said I had to eat fruits instead. I didn't care. Temptation awaited me. If you can't trust television advertisements, what CAN you trust? A good example was the jewellary brand "Destiny". They proclaimed that it was my destiny to own one. I immediately jumped at the opportunity. After forking out wads of cash which were insignificant compared to the chance that I held in my hands; to embrace my crappy destiny, I went to the shop. After requesting 8 cups of chinese tea and a jukebox that played Pop Goes The Weasel, I was ready to purchase jewellary..the tool to my destiny.

That day changed my life. It helped me realise that my destiny was a piece of crap, as i was a penniless teenager whose only possessions was a small ring. It really gave me an insight to the destiny before me.

Finally, I found an Almond flavoured Magnum chocolate ice-cream. I immediately faced my hardest challenge in a long while, the opening of the plastic wrapping. It took all of my dexterity, strength and intelligence to pinpoint its weak spot, which turned out to be the jagged end of the wrapper. It allowed my 0.1320582903290% more friction than normal, allowing me to rip open the wrapper, leaving me exhausted.

Then my next challenge appeared. After watching re-runs of the advertisement, i analysed the angle and way in which Eva bit into the ice-cream. After spending 30 minutes on that, during which my family yelled at me to stop hogging the television, i think i mastered the technique of biting, something that requires precise mouth eye coordination.

However, when i bit into the bar, chocolatey bits and vanilla ice cream bombarded me. Some went onto my cheek, some into my mouth and the majority up my nose. It gave me a new meaning to the phrase "up yours". I ignored that fact that i looked like a crazed lunatic, and continued with my second bite. I managed to get 50% of the mouthful into my mouth this time. My brain collapsed into an incomprehensible mush, also known as the fabled "Brain Freeze". I rinsed and repeated the process.

By the end of the bar, I looked like i had pushed my face into a chocolate cream cake. My family once again yelled at me to wipe my face, saying that ants would congregate and start a nest on my face. I refused, as this was the evidence of my manliness, my toying with temptation.

To celebrate, i'm going to facebook, creating an account and posting random pictures of boxes and crates in my account. What's the difference between a box and a crate? You fool! Look it up!

Signing off.
Ccw.